Psychological Abuse Doesn’t Happen All at Once: Healing After Divorce and Gaslighting

Psychological abuse rarely announces itself.

There is no single explosive moment. No clear line where you suddenly realize, This is abuse. Instead, it happens quietly—chip by chip, moment by moment—until your sense of self slowly disappears.

In a recent Bent Not Broken bonus coaching episode, I reflected on my powerful and raw conversation with Kristen Crabtree, a certified divorce coach and creator of the Paramore Paradox. Kristen spent 22 years in a psychologically abusive marriage, and what she shared resonated deeply with so many listeners navigating divorce, emotional abuse, and gaslighting.